Home > What's up with that, Dude? > What’s up with the crazy North Carolina laws, Dude?

What’s up with the crazy North Carolina laws, Dude?

January 6, 2010

Like South Carolina, or any state in the union for that matter, North Carolina has its share of laws that make little to no sense. Whether it was the era or someone with an agenda, this state has seen many a wacky law or something stating the all-too-obvious. To make sure that South Carolina isn’t alone, check out some of the laws that are (or were) on the North Carolina books.

SECTION. 5-8. Use of vehicles.

Stay-cationers, be warned: saving gas money by having your family picnic at the local cemetery is not only creepy, but it’s also illegal in North Carolina. The law states: It shall be unlawful for any person to enter the city cemeteries with a vehicle, except for the purposes of carrying material to make graves, building monuments, carrying tombstones or other material for ornamental purposes, transporting a dead body for interment, conveying therefrom a dead body exhumed, or other legitimate business related to the city cemeteries. Bummer. It does appear that all bets are off regarding mausoleums! Sure, they lack the sunshine and singing birds of a grave yard, at least you won’t find yourself with a fine and court appearance.

SECTION. 12-43. Vehicles not to be driven on sidewalks.

Thank you, Captain Obvious. They needed a law for this? Isn’t it listed somewhere in the North Carolina DMV manual as something you shouldn’t do?? Common sense, anybody? I understand the need for shortcuts, particularly when you find yourself in back of a tractor or some slow moving vehicle with no passing lane to be found (oh, have I found myself in back of a few crawlers, too). It seems pretty cut and dried that driving along a sidewalk isn’t the best decision to make, yet Dunn wanted to make sure you knew to stay on the road. Utility poles, trees, bushes, people and their pets, hazards to be found every few feet, driving on a sidewalk, it all reeks of being a bad idea. This seems to be one of the better “just so you know” laws on the books.

SECTION. 105-113.107. Excise tax on unauthorized substances.

This drug/substance law is both backwards and ahead of its time. A legal triple whammy, this law gives North Carolina the ability to fine you, imprison you, as well as tax your stash. Divided into several sections, this law details the various tax fines on the very substances that shouldn’t be in your possession to begin with. .40 cents for each gram of harvested marijuana separated from it’s stems and stalks, a whopping $3.50 per gram if it hasn’t been separated. $50.00 per gram of cocaine, $200 for any substance sold by weight, it goes on and on. Whether this law has been responsible for “sell high, carry low” (no pun intended) remains a mystery.

SECTION. 14-401.5. Practice of phrenology, palmistry, fortune-telling or clairvoyance prohibited.

Those fingers in my hair, that sly come hither stare, that strips my conscience bare, it’s witchcraft . . . or at least 61 out of the 100 counties in North Carolina seem to believe. Palm reading, spirit contacting, fortune telling, all banned in more than half of the state of North Carolina. Fear not, future clairvoyants, there is a workaround. Provided you’re an amateur, the safe ground for your practice lies in setting yourself up in a school or a church. The trick winds up in trying to talk the building owners into leasing you space. The schools might not be so hard. The church would be the trick, as I’m sure the only ghost they want summoned is holy. If Dan Brown can rile a church, one wonders what a fortune teller could do. I’m sure it would be fun to watch.

Geez, what’s up with the crazy laws, dude?

Got an NC legal question?



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